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Post by Kris on May 17, 2005 6:04:45 GMT
Dear LeYel, Thanks for the post. Very positive and thoughtful. By the way, it seems you have missed the onus of my posts. I never had any negitive thoughts about the outcome of the work I handle or what the people around are going to do with me. So where is the question of attracting people with negitive thoughts. It is only when I loose I look back to see what is wrong. I neither find any on my part nor I get any answer from people. It is complex to explain the question of sticking to the work place I am not comfortable with. Well you know I switched the job once. I have been trying for the last 3 years to switch again, it did not work. I sticking to the job because of financial security it gives me. Healing is not my profession. It had come to me naturally without great effort. I am not a qualified homeopath. So I cann't put up the board. ALMIGHTY DESIRES, SO I DO. I have great satisfaction doing it. I don't charge the people for the service offered. Now, the other side of it. Once I decided to charge for the services due to bad financial position. I put a box with label on it scribbling "CONTRIBUTE GENEROUSLY TOWARDS COST OF MEDICINE". It is clear that they was no compulsion to pay. The move backfired. People not only stopped coming to me but also started murmuring that I am greed of money. Some were even worse. They passed comments like "what do you know about medicine", "your medicine does not heal", "I took allopathy medicines for 6 months, they healed me, not your few globules" etc etc. It is very painful. They are the same people who hailed my services and approached me time and again. LeYel, WHAT'S WRONG ? I am not comfortable with loosing practice. I retreated but the damage is done. Now my practice is half it used to be. The kind of experiences I had with the people around brought me to the conclusion that "I am destined to serve others". I wanted to channel out the frustration in a smooth way without hurting others. I find this forum is the best to do so and simultaneously it may throwlight on WHAT'S WRONG OF MY APPROACHES. I did not find satisfactory answer till KARMA on seventh cusp caught my eye. Amoroso wants to shed some light on my experience with the people, using Dwads. Let us see what he says. All literature in astrology suggest matters where we have little/no control over matters indicated by outer planets. I can't agree with you for obvious reasons. We have to be mindful of the UNKNOWN and nurture the Soul to maintain equilibrium, a state where, I believe, peace of mind, heart and body reside. THAT IS ULTIMATE IN SOUL'S GROWTH or simply the maturity. Kim, are you reading this post ? regards Kris
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LeYeL
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Post by LeYeL on May 17, 2005 16:01:01 GMT
Dear Kris, Thank you for saying my post was thoughtful and positive I am not always and that's a fact! I am very interested in seeing your chart. Would you post the birth details or send me the information in a private message if you aren't comfortable posting it in the forum? I do not have the skills that many of the others do in reading charts, but your posts really resonate with me. I can feel your pain and frustration. I have my birth chart posted here in the Asteroids Forum, under the Hello topic, with Svenskasfinx's kindness. She also explained how she did it. The instructions are in the Introduction forum. I have gone to photobucket and uploaded, but still not used yet on the forum. But I am working up my courage to do so LOL. In my chart I have Mars conjunct the MC. I have been told many times I come across as aggressive. This has caused me a lot of grief in my long time job, which is crappy in so many ways. It always is somewhat amusing to me that a man could do or say much more than I ever have, but that is perceived in a different way. I don't know about where you work but it has always been brought home to me in spades that aggression, while a valued trait in a man is not valued in anyway if it applies to a woman. I am one of very few women that work in the sawmill, and I have been there since June 04/79. I stay there for the same reason as you. I support myself, my husband died while we were separated after 25 years of marriage. I got nothing, and let's just say that the inlaws found a great place to hang all their nastiness and negativity concerning his death on me. They want to blame me for the fact he took up drinking after a 13 year abstinance and his death. He died on his motorcycle and we couldn't find him until a week later. Anyway, I refuse to buy into their stuff.. I am not to blame in anyway. I make my own life and have made many mistakes and will continue to do so, and I take responsibilty for what I know is my fault. Back to the job thing.. while the term aggressive is a valued trait in a man, it is a very derogatory term for a woman. I have been hurt and had to fight hard for every position that I have applied for. I have had lies stated about me in both the job and my personal life. This is one of the worst things, and after so many years, while I am still outraged when I hear some totally false thing attributed to me, I have learned to just let it go mostly. Honesty to me, is one of the top things I value in others, and myself. People know when they ask me a question I will say exactly what I think. Sometimes they don't have to ask LOL . This is one reason why I am viewed as aggressive, added to that I am intelligent and not afraid to use that gift verbally. But deeper into this, I realize that anger is a state I am comfortable with. When I am hurt I get angry, and I hurt a lot over so many things. When I feel I am not in control of anything bad going on around me, I get angry* just realized in re-reading that I needed to add this.. when I am FEARFUL*. When I see someone being treated unfairly, I get angry. And I am angry at myself, for not making better decisions in the past, and not making the most of myself.. in too many ways to list here. So what I am learning, is how to try and shift my perspective and really start addressing my own anger issues. My birth chart shows me where I can get stuck, and those same aspects also show me where I can use the energy to make a positive difference in my life. The reason I might sound all rah rah and positive is that I have seen so many charts of famous people that have made a real difference in this world, and some of their charts show some pretty heavy things, that I sure wouldn't want to have in my chart! My own is heavy enough thank you! I just can't buy into the premise that the stars positions in the heavens make anything bad happen to me. Even the doom and gloom that is the standard opinion of a Merc retrograde, is just an energy that is there for me to use. I can believe my computer might crash, and I DO take heed to read the fine print etc etc LOL but that doesn't mean that all the negatives attributed to the Merc state are going to happen to me. Do you see what I mean? I certainly do not ignore any of the wisdom that certain aspects or transits in the heavens don't have potent force on my being, but it is just an energy. I can use this energy anyway I want. I can blame those aspects if I want when something sh***y happens too if that is my choice. But I prefer to think that I have a Mars on the MC for a reason, and that all my battles mean something. I may not make a difference to the world in any significant way, but I can make my life better, and I can have happiness and security in my own being. I can be comfortable in my own skin and proud of myself! And I have decided that I have earned all of this as my birth right and that is what I am working on achieving. I just wanted you to know that your posts made me feel a lot and think about so many things in my life. I am learning so much in this forum, and the people here are VERY kind and supportive and the astrological knowledge blows me away constantly. I hope you feel that caring like I do Please do NOT let the damage done in the past.. colour your expectations of your future. I know that isn't easy to do.. I am a Taurus.. the past is as present within me as the future. One suggestion I have that maybe might give you something to play with? Think back to something in the past that was SO good it jumps out at you. Think all around that good thing. How were you feeling.. what was your emotional state? What was your family or relationship like at that time. What did that good thing give you hope for in the future!!? Whether or not it lead to better things.. think about just that time when you had JOY.. that specific moment. No one in this world has not had at least one moment like that. Maybe it will give you an aha moment, maybe it won't but it will start the process that I can promise. Brightest Blessings to you Kris LeYeL
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Post by Amoroso on May 18, 2005 0:59:56 GMT
Dear Kris. I am a "she." Let me start off by saying that I, too, feel your frustration and pain. I asked about Virgo energy and dwads, of which you do have some--and that Virgo moon--so my observation may help. I have observed that all planetary energy can manifest either positivily or negatively, and that occurs for the asteroid "Karma," too. (will get to that in a minute.) The positive Virgo energy is extremely discerning, observant and interested in taking care of details with care and follow through. The flip side of Virgo is some pessimism, self-effaciement, fussiness and insisting on driving people as hard as you drive yourself. Perhaps the fire and drive that you have at work is sometimes informed by negative side of Virgo. It could turn people off from the good work you do, in favor of an 'easier" personality, or actually keep you in a position because you are seen only for your detail work and not for the energy or vision behind it that you may have. Just a thought. Obviously the whole chart needs to be taken into conisderation, and somewhere on this forum someone brought up the point that the chart has to be seen as a whole with the Draconic and Solar Return. It is interesting that Virgo and the 6th house rule healers and that you have some experience with healing. From the way you described how you went about starting to charge for services, I would say that you just didn't go about it in an effective way, not that this was another example of Karma in the seventh. ( I have worked freelance with private clients for 25 years.) I think these are more Mercury and Venus sorts of skills. Perhaps the positive side to "Karma" is that it actually can show one the power of forgiveness and compassion. These super-human traits are found within and are "grown" by your intention. You don't have to "feel" them to have them work. An example is that I co-founded a school with a partner in 2000, and it was a huge success, largely due to my efforts and our effective collaboration. Two years later, she and the Board president suddenly asked me to leave, and it became clear that if I didn't resign I would be fired. It was a malicious move on their part, and the school closed 6 months after I left. I was very, very angry and found many appropriate physiscal outlets as well as artistic outlets for the anger. My intent was to forgive her, but allow myself the anger for as long as I needed to be angry. (Some of the art work from that period is of a giant hand with a third finger sticking up...eloquent, it was not.) I talked with friends and parents, I continued to intend to forgive. After two months, I was able to write her a note, asking for her forgivenes for my part in the break-up and telling her she had mine. She wrote me a note back. Karma? Yes, but it is over and done with now. I finshed it. And I grew from taking an excrutiatingly honest look at my part in the trouble. It is true I was stabbed in the back, and I did not have the skills to keep from handing her the knife. I know better now. Another Virgo trait is to "not see the forest for the trees" and while I do not for a minute doubt the strength of asteroids, I would think Karma in the 7th could also mean drawing people to you who bless you and love you. They may challenge you, too, but I can't think of one loving relationship in my life that hasn't challenged me. Hope this helps, or stimulates some of your own thoughts. Blessings, Amoroso
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Post by Kris on May 18, 2005 8:17:42 GMT
Dear LeYel and Amoroso,
Thank you very much for the response. Your experiences are revealing. I AM DEEPLY MOVED AND EMOTIONAL FOR A WHILE. There is definite resonance among we three.
I did not put my birth details at the forum for I had a fear that people make a mess of it. I intend to channel out my pains by sharing with others. But over the years I learnt not to do so because of the heckle and jeer I was subjected to by the people on hearing my problems. Kim, I shower all the praise on you for initiating the forum. Thank you so much. It is the place where I find people resonate to LIFE experiences positively and regularly. LeYel, I emailed my brith details to you.
My vocabulary is limited as english is not my mother tongue. I explain what I do in trying circumstances. It may help you both in the relook of your problems.
LeYel, in the childhood, I was very aggressive and I use to lie a lot. Many of the issues are inconsequential. Still, I use to lie. I don't know why. Everytime, I feel guilty and cann't move around with my head high nor I could look into the eyes of others. At 18, I was ashamed of myself and promised myself to be clean. I laid down some conditions like "I lie if and only if it helps somebody and does not harm anybody including myself". Since then truth is my strength. I never lied for the last 40 years. I strongly believe that truth saved me a number of times. I don't quote instances now. I understand, now, that presumtion instigate to lie over the matters. As we stand by the truth presumtions vanish, aggression is controlled. You find the life much better as you resign from the issue by making your point clear. Believe that the lier is the sufferer, not you. Mars on your MC do attract aggressive people. Look into the chracteristics of your ASC and the placement of it's lord. Are they devoid of affliction ? If so you can address the problem. Have a relook into it.
Amoroso, your school experience moved me a lot. I had a similar experience where I did all the hard work and someone else is benefitted. It was with my ex-exployer where I served in a subordinate cadre. I thought I can get the credit for the hardwork I put up provided a separate unit for the subordinate people to operate from. The proposal was turned down time and time eventhough I projected the benefits in no uncertain terms. As I left, the rest in my cadre were found not suitable enough in terms of responsiblity and speed in disposing the work. The cadre controller find it hard to face the ministries etc. So they decided to get rid of their own responsibility by creating separate unit for my cadre. They simply opened the old file I generated and gave a clearance to the proposal. Mr.X became the head of the unit. HA..HA..HA.. O LA LA. Had it been during my tenure, I would not have left my ex-employer. I had great great great work satisfaction there. So, whom to blame. I had to blame my qualities at work.
Every morning, immediately after bath, I practice "breath therapy" simlataneouly praying a Hindu goddess called "GAYATRI". Sitting in a specified posture, keeping the mind blank and by concentrating on my forehead I chant a four line Sanskrit Sloka for some time. After finishing it, I pray the Goddess to bless me with "peace of mind". In trying circumstance, I go on chanting the Sloka irrespective of where I am. Simply do it, that's all. You may call it meditation. Whatever be the name, I am immensely benefited from it.
I AM VERY COOL. ALL THE AGGRESSION I USE TO SHOW IS BROUGHT UNDER CONTROL. I NEVER SHOUT, EVENIF THE SITUATION WARRANTS, MUCH TO THE SURPRISE OF MY COLLEGUES and intuitively I can say that
THEY FEAR FINDING THE WEAPON I HOLD - THE TRUTH THEY COME TO ME BECAUSE I AM TRUSTWORTHY.
It is obvious over long years of experience that my strategy at workplace fail to benefit me for strange reasons. Brooding over the same damaged my mind, heart and physical health. So, I learnt to be soft with myself by knowing the UNKNOWN.
Revered Sage Sri Satya Sai Baba of India once responded to one of his deciples by asking him to think of "MANAVA DHARMA", means the "nature of humans" on mother earth". We don't know "where from and where to" of our life's journey. In a pensive mood I realised that in the journey of life thrusted upon me I have to carry out different responsibilites going through various phases of physical body. I do my duty and leave the rest to Almighty. That is what LORD KRISHNA PREACH ARJUNA IN BHAGAVADGITA.
I am very emotional at the moment. Wants to write something but not clear of what. I have written something above. It seems I lost the track, yet I hope information is useful. LeYel, I shall go through your horoscope posted at the forum and come back to you.
I am sorry Amoroso for missing that you are a "she". Thank you for the information on Virgo traits and Karma on 7th cusp. Your are on the spot explaining Virgo. May be Psyche conjunct Moon in Virgo has added further by stirring up the intuition. Virgo traits together with Karma on 7th cusp filled in the picture by and large.
regards Kris
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Post by tarion on May 19, 2005 14:25:04 GMT
Hello everyone! Just thought I'd share a little of my experience with the vertex... I recently met someone whose vertex was conjunct my venus and whose moon was conjunct my vertex. Very close orbs, 1 degree. We met on the net, and that exact day Jupiter was conjunct my vertex, and when we met face to face, jupiter again was on my vertex because it went retrograde! Almost too good to be true, in addition composite vertex was also conjunct the composite descendant. I have to say I thought I found my soulmate, but, alas, when we met we both realised that this was not the case! Well, especially him, I have to confess.. All his planets falls in my sixth house, which is already too crowded in my opinion, except his mercury/eros conjunction opposite my ascendant and his mars in my seventh house. So he had a very strong effect on me, in addition my moon was conjunct his ascendant, making me even more aware of him. But, we have no saturn-contacts whatsoever, except his saturn trine my venus, 2 degree orb, but not in sign. I think it's true what some say about vertex, you might feel that you've somehow wished the other into life and think that he/she is everything you've ever dreamed of, but you might get it in a "perverted" manner! He was exactly the kind of person I've always wanted, but now I'll think I'll give other personality types a chance too. So I guess I've learned a valuble lesson, which might be just what I've needed. And who knows if "fate" wanted me to do just that!
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Post by Kim Falconer on May 20, 2005 1:40:09 GMT
Hi Tarion, Welcome to the forum and thanks for the post on your vertex experience. The vertex is like that. It can be a catalyst for inner change although it comes wrapped in the "package" of the mysterious other. I think the Ve/Sa contact is strong, though it could have raised some "fears" in one or the other of you. Did it feel like "just friends" or did if feel like someone what running away from their feelings? Again, welcome! Kim
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Post by tarion on May 20, 2005 18:33:05 GMT
Hello again and thanks for your replies Kim, I guess Venus trine Saturn is a strong contact, I actually have it with several guys I know, because many born in the same year as me have Saturn in appropriate degrees for my Venus. I find it comforting in a way, I see them as dependable and strong. And I have no desire to "run". Maybe I need it, I have Venus opposite Uranus (in 7th...) and square Mars... He has Moon conjunct Saturn (4 degree orb) in Libra, so maybe he is somehow running away from/hiding his feelings. And I guess Sun and Asc in Libra and Venus in Virgo isn't the easiest combination when it comes to relating either. I've read about your Venus/Vertex contact previously Scorpymoon, hope it works out all right for you! I think it can be a very powerful contact! Another discussion thread I've read says that this contact probably is most powerful for the Venus person, what do you think? I would think it would be strongest for the Vertex person, but then again, with my recent experience, maybe it is Venus? I like your name by the way, I have a 0 degree scorpion moon and I sometimes wonder how I manage, but luckily it is sextile jupiter, it really helps!
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Post by tarion on May 21, 2005 9:16:00 GMT
Lol, funny thing that vertex! Thanks for your thoughts on Vertex/Venus, you have many interesting experiences there! I totally agree with the consept of vertex being a point in a chart and therefore should't affect the planetary person in quite the same way. And with Venus in hard aspect to Uranus, ah, I think we both know how it affects us! I've just met someone who has the nameasteroid of the guy I had the vertex contacts with, on my vertex! Funny, but I guess if you look after things like that, something always comes up. My moon is exactly opposite this new guy's vertex, actually don't like that, I've had enough of vertex for the time being... But then again, with vertex involved, who knows what's going to happen!
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Post by tarion on May 23, 2005 13:07:29 GMT
Well, I think moon opposition vertex is important, but alas, not quite so much to the moon person (me)... Too bad, but I hope he's somehow grown/learnt something through his contact with me. At www.cafeastrology.com/synastry.html, sun or moon conjunct or opposite vertex is regarded as one of the strongest compatibility factors (score 4). Venus conjunct or opposite vertex is only a good compatibility factor (score 2). It's interesting, but of course, this scoring system is only a general guideline.
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Post by aquariusrising on Jun 12, 2005 1:02:36 GMT
Hi Kim and All,
I have been so busy acclimating to my new job and life I haven't had much time for the forum. Too bad because I learn so much here and I enjoy everyone's insights. Okay, here is a connection I have a question about. My IC/Pan/Mars Venus midpoint, conjunct his Vertex. Not sure how these energies would unfold. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks much!!
A.R.
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Post by aquariusrising on Jun 12, 2005 1:05:19 GMT
Kim, I just noticed I am being shown as a new member Can you please bump me back up to a Senior Member?? I hope so. A.R.
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Post by Kim Falconer on Jun 12, 2005 8:31:00 GMT
My IC/Pan/Mars Venus midpoint, conjunct his Vertex. Not sure how these energies would unfold. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Hi A.R I'm not sure how strong a midpoint to Vertex synastry would be. We need to investigate this further. The midpoint your describe is a point of deep, inner security as expressed through your desires, your values, what you find artistic, aesthetic and beautiful. It has both introverted and very personal components and also strong drive and passion. What is the degree and sign of this point? Decan and Dwad might add more import as it is the same as his Vertex. It might tell a bit about how he encounters a "turning point" and how that feels to him (how that degree of the zodiac and house position meshes with the rest of his chart. Has anyone else noticed synastry activations from midpoints to Vertex? I'll check my vaults and see what I find. Good to see you!! I’ll fix your status pronto. I don’t know what happened there??? Kim
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Post by aquariusrising on Jun 12, 2005 13:50:34 GMT
Hi Kim:
Thanks for replying so quickly. Upon furher investigation, this connection looks more intriguing. His Vertex at 28.54 Taurus in his 8th house conjunct my IC 0 deg Gem/Pan 0 deg Gem /Anteros 27 deg Taurus as well as Venus/Mars midpoint at 27 deg Taurus. I guess I need to figure out that whole IC area of my chart. I am guessing, for me, the IC with Pan and Ma/Ve midpoint so close would indicate, that perhaps, there is an earthy/inquisitive sexuality to my nature which is discovered only by those close to me or intimate. Anteros here? I haven't the faintest idea. Now, with his Vertex conjuncting this area, and in touch with his 8th house, I get the feeling that maybe the turning point for him would be in my revealing the deepest part of my nature? Also, Jupiter is opposing, so there must be some sort of expansion here. Am I close in this interpretation, or way off base?? Anteros? I'm stumped. I would love to know your thoughts.
It is good to be back!!
A.R.
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Post by aquariusrising on Jun 12, 2005 13:51:05 GMT
Oh Kim,
Thanks so much for fixing my status!!
A.R.
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Post by SSG on Dec 29, 2005 2:05:09 GMT
Okay, having a tough time figuring this out. I was wondering if someone could give me a hand with this: His stellium involving Ceres, Juno, N. Node and Vertex, all in Leo conjunct MY vertex. Among other things, would this account for the EXTREMELY intense (unsettling even) effect he has on me? I am almost tempted to make the first move, which is very, very rare for me (Venus square Saturn). Or does that involve Adonis?(there is an Adonis conjunction in Libra as well! ) Hmmm, I guess I should be posting charts LOL....
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