Post by samina on Nov 1, 2006 18:01:53 GMT
Wow. I just had one of those amazing astrological a-ha's when the planets convey one of their powerful messages of meaning and synchronicity. I'm blown away.
I know this is going to be long post, so I'll put out a little advisory that it's for anyone who wants to add another little piece of shade to their own developing understanding of Sedna.
I began exploring Sedna yesterday for the first time in my charts & transits, and I've found that she had a role during one of the most defining, transformational periods in my life. I was never satisfied that I had found something astrologically that adequately described the gauntlet of events that dominated my life at the time... but Sedna definitely appears to be the missing piece.
When I read Kim's article on Sedna yesterday, as I was reading about the hideous and violent aspects of her story, of the various ways she represents victimization and her own way of coming into her power through travelling to the icy depths of her psyche, I kept feeling such dejavu, as if all of that was deeply, intimately familiar terrain.
From 1995 through 2000, and peaking during 1998-1999, I was embroiled in a cluster of legal disputes from which I wasn't able to escape, even when I wanted to concede and walk away -- it was a gauntlet I was forced karmically by life to go through, and for at least four years felt very much as if I were away at war.
The issues pertained to custody of my children, child support, having my home taken away from me through a mind-boggling injustice, being unable to escape from an impoverished existence no matter what I tried, and -- most dramatically -- a long legal battle with a Sopranos-type family, which culminated in a 2-week jury trial. The overall tone of that time was like Erin Brokovitch on steroids. LOL I laugh now -- and laughed many, many times at the time at the utter ridiculousness of the impossible odds against me -- but the difficulty of those years is beyond anything words could describe. When I emerged from that time, I had absolutely nothing (on a material level), was deeply in debt, and had to build my life up from scratch.
But the experience gave me so, so much, for reasons and in ways that would be better expressed in a book than in a post I'm trying to keep from becoming too long. I acquired a
real sense of inner power, and inner peace, and a kind of easy confidence and feeling of trust in the universe that has borne me so far from where I was back then. The experience helped define who I've become, but it isn't really a part of my life now -- it's more like I'm living a new life, and all that is really a past one. I absolutely without a doubt shed a skin that I remember, but which is no longer part of me.
So what I found were the following Sedna transits during the hardest, darkest times of that journey:
In Feb of 1998, when I began serving as my own attorney and filed some very complex legal actions and argued my way successfully through a number of actions in Superior Court, Sedna was just beginning it's transit to my natal 8th-house Jupiter, while Saturn was exactly conjunct my 7th-house Vertex and Mars was on my 6th-house Chiron (I was also recovering from systemic Lyme disease at the time -- yowza, forgot about that piece).
Later in the year, when I tried to gather help to deal with my challenges from various legal sources and came up with nil, which left me in profound financial as well as emotional crisis, Sedna was exactly on my Jupiter (at 16Taurus) and Saturn was on my natal Sedna (at 29Aries).
And later, on October 14, 1999, the day that my jury trial with the mafiosos culminated in a crucifixion that appeared to have been engineered through less-than-above-board means, BOTH Sedna and Saturn (which were less than 1/2 a degree apart) were sitting exactly on my 8th-house Jupiter!
Now, my natal Jupiter is in a very close opposition to Neptune. There was a tremendous amount of spiritual support & guidance available to me intuitively throughout that journey, and I experienced if profoundly. The theme that permeated the guidance, tho, was all richly sea-based, as with Sedna
-- I felt powerful whale totems with me, and they comforted as I released so much sorrow throughout those years, the kind of sorrow that makes the psyche come undone and from which many people don't escape. It was like lifetimes and generations of sorrow came through me from so much betrayal -- at times I even felt like a filter for global sorrow, that a certain intense frequency of grief was pouring through me because I had the fortitude to experience and release it. And whale energy seemed to be the carrier and understander of this. While dolphins and blue water
(and bluebirds!) would emerge in my dreams to uplift me and help me make it through.
The agents of betrayal for all of these crises were all men whom I'd trusted, and each of them sought to tear me down because they were deeply threatened by my own power, whether that came through insightfulness or decisiveness, clarity of mind, or even that I did not fight back vindictively but always maintained a kind of dignity and virtue, I suppose -- nothing would piss them off more than that, that I wasn't a dirty fighter. But collectively they took everything of value from me except the power in my own soul.
And never until today did I find the astrological influences at that time that really pointed to the immensity of what I went through.
I just had to share this, because I know how young our understanding is of Sedna's role. This is going to be burning through my mind for weeks, at the very least...
What has everyone else found with respect to Sedna's role in their own story?
Love-love,
Samina
I know this is going to be long post, so I'll put out a little advisory that it's for anyone who wants to add another little piece of shade to their own developing understanding of Sedna.
I began exploring Sedna yesterday for the first time in my charts & transits, and I've found that she had a role during one of the most defining, transformational periods in my life. I was never satisfied that I had found something astrologically that adequately described the gauntlet of events that dominated my life at the time... but Sedna definitely appears to be the missing piece.
When I read Kim's article on Sedna yesterday, as I was reading about the hideous and violent aspects of her story, of the various ways she represents victimization and her own way of coming into her power through travelling to the icy depths of her psyche, I kept feeling such dejavu, as if all of that was deeply, intimately familiar terrain.
From 1995 through 2000, and peaking during 1998-1999, I was embroiled in a cluster of legal disputes from which I wasn't able to escape, even when I wanted to concede and walk away -- it was a gauntlet I was forced karmically by life to go through, and for at least four years felt very much as if I were away at war.
The issues pertained to custody of my children, child support, having my home taken away from me through a mind-boggling injustice, being unable to escape from an impoverished existence no matter what I tried, and -- most dramatically -- a long legal battle with a Sopranos-type family, which culminated in a 2-week jury trial. The overall tone of that time was like Erin Brokovitch on steroids. LOL I laugh now -- and laughed many, many times at the time at the utter ridiculousness of the impossible odds against me -- but the difficulty of those years is beyond anything words could describe. When I emerged from that time, I had absolutely nothing (on a material level), was deeply in debt, and had to build my life up from scratch.
But the experience gave me so, so much, for reasons and in ways that would be better expressed in a book than in a post I'm trying to keep from becoming too long. I acquired a
real sense of inner power, and inner peace, and a kind of easy confidence and feeling of trust in the universe that has borne me so far from where I was back then. The experience helped define who I've become, but it isn't really a part of my life now -- it's more like I'm living a new life, and all that is really a past one. I absolutely without a doubt shed a skin that I remember, but which is no longer part of me.
So what I found were the following Sedna transits during the hardest, darkest times of that journey:
In Feb of 1998, when I began serving as my own attorney and filed some very complex legal actions and argued my way successfully through a number of actions in Superior Court, Sedna was just beginning it's transit to my natal 8th-house Jupiter, while Saturn was exactly conjunct my 7th-house Vertex and Mars was on my 6th-house Chiron (I was also recovering from systemic Lyme disease at the time -- yowza, forgot about that piece).
Later in the year, when I tried to gather help to deal with my challenges from various legal sources and came up with nil, which left me in profound financial as well as emotional crisis, Sedna was exactly on my Jupiter (at 16Taurus) and Saturn was on my natal Sedna (at 29Aries).
And later, on October 14, 1999, the day that my jury trial with the mafiosos culminated in a crucifixion that appeared to have been engineered through less-than-above-board means, BOTH Sedna and Saturn (which were less than 1/2 a degree apart) were sitting exactly on my 8th-house Jupiter!
Now, my natal Jupiter is in a very close opposition to Neptune. There was a tremendous amount of spiritual support & guidance available to me intuitively throughout that journey, and I experienced if profoundly. The theme that permeated the guidance, tho, was all richly sea-based, as with Sedna
-- I felt powerful whale totems with me, and they comforted as I released so much sorrow throughout those years, the kind of sorrow that makes the psyche come undone and from which many people don't escape. It was like lifetimes and generations of sorrow came through me from so much betrayal -- at times I even felt like a filter for global sorrow, that a certain intense frequency of grief was pouring through me because I had the fortitude to experience and release it. And whale energy seemed to be the carrier and understander of this. While dolphins and blue water
(and bluebirds!) would emerge in my dreams to uplift me and help me make it through.
The agents of betrayal for all of these crises were all men whom I'd trusted, and each of them sought to tear me down because they were deeply threatened by my own power, whether that came through insightfulness or decisiveness, clarity of mind, or even that I did not fight back vindictively but always maintained a kind of dignity and virtue, I suppose -- nothing would piss them off more than that, that I wasn't a dirty fighter. But collectively they took everything of value from me except the power in my own soul.
And never until today did I find the astrological influences at that time that really pointed to the immensity of what I went through.
I just had to share this, because I know how young our understanding is of Sedna's role. This is going to be burning through my mind for weeks, at the very least...
What has everyone else found with respect to Sedna's role in their own story?
Love-love,
Samina
