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Post by ana on Apr 2, 2010 12:01:59 GMT
Can you not get a bit of nurturing for you from others on the net? Here.....a big motherly Moon in Cancer cyberhug for you.........And the ringing your mum thing sounds positive for both of you.....But. I agree it is vitally important for a woman to nurture herself in the way that feels best and not give out without limits......... A male kinesiologist told me that female massage therapists are prone to get very sick when they do not look after their own needs and get some sort of natural therapy themselves regularly to balance out all the giving out. Tho' you do get back something when you give out a lot to others Just not enough to balance I guess
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Post by ariesmoon on Apr 13, 2010 17:17:30 GMT
hi ana thank you for the hug! Just seen your post. Am going for regular sound healing treatments which is very nurturing for me, and also taking up gardening again after a long break. Pottering (and potting!) with the earth good for me it helps bring out my 12th house/AC Taurus.
But I am hard on myself, I caught myself a few days ago getting very angry at something I hadn't done, and stopped myself short thinking "and how would you speak to someone else in those circumstances?" I realised how harsh and hard I was being on myself. That's a lifelong trait and one I'm working hard to address.
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Post by ariesmoon on Jul 19, 2010 16:58:13 GMT
Pluto has retrograded back to oppose my Sun again, and boy have I had the lesson to end all lessons this afternoon. About relinquishing ego but gaining in strength and power.
I've recently been off ill for 2 weeks. Before that, I'd been going into work with increasingly bad sciatic pain, thinking I was essential, that I couldn't go off sick. In the end I was forced to.
I've been forced to accept, on my return, that things have to change. I'm not indispensible (no one is), I haven't been organised, and the way I had been before going off sick had affected my working life in such a way as to impact on everyone else whilst I was away. I'm feeling like I've had several layers of skin stripped off this afternoon but at the same time, I'm feeling stronger because I accepted readily what needed changing for the good of the organisation. For someone with Saturn in the 10th to be told her way of doing the job has been chaotic was numbing, as it's so important to me to be seen to be efficient and organised. But I quickly realised how I can use my Saturn in the 10th to demonstrate the detachment and coolness needed to play the role properly, and to accept the help and support that has been offered to me.
I was beginning to wonder what it was that had to go during this Pluto transit and the recent full moon eclipse. Now I know. It's the Cancerian part of me that needs to be needed and accepted, and the illusion that I can just keep going and keep going until I drop and no-one else will be affected.
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Post by ariesmoon on Jul 20, 2010 0:34:05 GMT
The bit about "playing a role" has come back to me, after about an hour crying (no, howling would be more accurate). I needed it. When I stopped, and just lay still in the silence, what came to me was profound. I've been acting out the energies of Pluto, as befits a 5th house natal Pluto, and others are spooked by it. Because it came out in the workplace, where it's not supposed to be. It slipped the boundaries from 5th house into the 6th. Steven Forrest, in his fabulous "Book of Pluto" says about this placement "your destiny lies in symbolising the dark for us and ideally representing for us a path through the dark". He goes on to say that at some point, the soul with a 5th house Pluto is told "to keep a lid on it" because those energies unsettle and disturb people. And that the answer is to tap into what Forrest calls "a kind of Dionysian creative ecstasy". He says "the shape of the creativity doesn't matter. What matters is that you lose yourself in it, surrender to it, go willingly and intentionally towards that edge beyond which lies madness. Something in you must abandon inhibition and self-consciousness and learn to roar". Sca-ry. Which is precisely the point. I quote so much of Steven Forrest not just because it's fabulous writing but that it nails, absolutely, what Pluto is seeming to want of me. Whilst it's not appropriate to let this kind of energy out in the workplace, it's absolutely vital to my health to let it out in a safe play place - a stage, a canvas, a dancefloor, a drumming circle. The nugget of gold in amongst all the s**t I waded through tonight is that there is that there is a part of me that needs to act out tough stuff. And that knows how therapeutic that is. And if it's therapeutic for me, perhaps it's time to search out dramatherapy. Both for myself and maybe, ultimately, as a career.
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Post by Aphrodite on Jul 22, 2010 2:32:55 GMT
WOW! Fabulous idea! Perfect expression of your strong 12th house Moon and Mars, and now Uranus too. Emotion, energy and inspiration translated: Lights, camera.... ACTION!
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Post by ariesmoon on Jul 24, 2010 14:46:21 GMT
Thanks Aphrodite am looking into it!
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Post by ana on Aug 7, 2010 14:11:02 GMT
Hope you are going okay Ariesmoon. This forum seems to be sleeping................ shame I hope it revives......................
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Post by ariesmoon on Aug 7, 2010 18:45:49 GMT
Hi Ana! Lovely to catch you here - I don't visit the forum much anymore because there's so few people using it! I do like to keep sharing stories though and I use Kim's site as a resource.
Am doing OK - I just seem to need to sleep a lot at the moment, unlike many others who I''ve been reading about who are awake a lot! The Cardinal energy has exhausted me I think! Saturn through the 6th (a long old transit - my Descendant cusp is 27 Scorpio ...) might have something to do with it. I'm getting lots of lessons, which I'm taking on board, slowly, about nurturing myself. With so much hitting my Cancer Sun, in the 2nd, I suppose that's inevitable! Quite a shock though to realise how little I've done it in the past.
How are you doing?
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Post by ana on Aug 9, 2010 12:03:38 GMT
Ah well my asc/descendant is about 5 degrees past yours and I have got a mild rerun of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome........ called I forget what in England........which I got the first time one Saturn cycle ago.................. not the first rerun though I will get over it and I am managing a full time digital art course 4 days a week. Just not very sparky or creative. It was going to Sydney and back from Perth within 2 weeks on the train 3 and a half days each way that did it............... Pluto and those squares all around seem to be doing a lot to people One geomancy group I am in has a member passing out new age coloured articles about the grand cross and how much we must meditate and stay in our centres while it is ' on' as if it is going to turn on on the day and off like a tap when the exact square is passed. Annoying the advice in the new agey article is quite sound................just need to do it a lot longer than they seem to think............... My Moon in Cancer 4 degrees wiped me out earlier in year and I spent a lot at a naturopath -using a machine to measure what was going on with organs etc and treating with homeopathics-with success- but seem to be back to square one now almost. Will have to do it myself this time!!!!
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Post by ariesmoon on Aug 19, 2010 5:30:35 GMT
I've waited a few days until it felt right to post this.
My dear, lovely dad died last weekend. In his sleep, having had his whole family around him only a couple of days before, as it was his and mum's wedding anniversary. It's been a very tough last six months for him, dealing with a skin cancer operation and decreasing mobility to the point of being totally immobile, and needing to be moved by others. Very tough to watch, but even tougher to endure.
Losing him has made me think deeply about the process of grief - that when we grieve, we are grieving for our own loss. The gap in our own lives which can't be filled by anyone else. The person who has died has chosen their moment and has been released, and we can't help but be grateful for that in my dad's case. That is comforting me greatly, as is the joy we are having - yes, joy - in remembering his life.
I was priviledged to be there, and to be able to say goodbye to him very soon after he'd passed. It was quite the most beautiful, tender and terrifying moment of my life so far. I looked Pluto in the eye, and he holds very little fear for me now. Which is, I think, what he ultimately wants of us.
I hesitated before writing this, feeling that it might unsettle those reading it. And then I thought, people don't go searching for posts on Pluto opposite the Sun because they want to be comforted. They do it because they want to look Pluto in the eye. Part of this transit for me - and particularly in the last few days - has been to realise that I cannot be responsible for other people's feelings. I don't hurt anyone deliberately, but how they take the news is down to them. I can't protect them from the pain it may cause them. Pluto tears down pretences. Death is death.
A Pluto transit opposite your Sun doesn't always mean the death of the father. In my case it did, but Dad was 82 and in poor health for several years. It was his right time to leave us. And he's left behind him treasured memories of a loving, gentle, proud and passionate man who I'm privileged to have known and loved. If I find his like in my own soul mate, I'll be blessed.
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Post by ana on Sept 1, 2010 11:09:20 GMT
Thanks for the post about your dad and I am sorry for your loss I agree with you that it is our loss we are grieving about - THEY are probably" going to a better place"to quote a cliche - when my folks died within a year of each other it was the not having anyone who really cared deeply about my family that I really noticed No one to show the latest photos of the family to. No one to be proud of any achievements made A dimension of life totally missing with the positive and negative sides Except of course that you can still talk with them and share things with them if you care to.......Mine left during the Pluto 7th house transit along with several other friends so I have been doing artwork on the issues around loss and separation and reunion this year I think that will be a theme for a long time yet
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Post by ariesmoon on Sept 2, 2010 17:31:46 GMT
Hi Ana great to see you on here, I thought I was the only one! I do talk to dad.
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Post by ana on Sept 4, 2010 8:42:18 GMT
That is good I have had infrequent but enough happenings to know that there is interaction that is real It is a shame this forum is rather dormant I am on an esoteric gardening one which seems to go in waves Sometimes active for weeks on end and then dead as a dodo for months But it survives This one is more to do with Kim having too many plates to spin at the moment I suppose Her input is likely more of a draw than perhaps she knew
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Post by airedale on Sept 4, 2010 18:35:18 GMT
Ariesmoon
So sorry to hear of your dad’s passing. Thank you for sharing your thoughts & process. Sounds like you treasured him. You are right, there is joy in remembering. Peace to you.
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Post by Kim Falconer on Oct 1, 2010 20:36:36 GMT
Ariesmoon,
Sending you all the love in the world. This has really touched me as the anniversary of my father's death ten years ago approaches.
How are you feeling now?
Please take care and give yourself heaps of nurturing!
x Kim
Also . . . I'm brainstorming the next best step for this forum. Input of course welcome.
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